reverence for the super-NATURAL....

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day in day out.....every call from them...every call from the two persons who hold high above anything and everything i have ever known in my life throws a string of clutch thro me..... yeah correct m referring to my parents.... they have been the best support for my life til date though i have never been an inch closer to them in terms of sharing and discussing things related to me...atleast not personal if at all anything professional.....

i have been trying to accept so many things that they have told me....try to atleast nod the damn head of mine and make them feel happy... but sometimes it crosses the epitome of my nerves....specially when it comes to GOD...the true power of the earth as i assume it.. or may be as i believe in it ..... wts GOD for me is a belief that i have inmy soul.... i dont consult with anyone if or but of GOD.... and so i dont like to advice anyone to pray or be an atheist... but belief in god is something i think is prime for the survival....

now also i dont say it to be accepted by everyone.. its jus a self thought....fine fine... m getting off topic...

what i was trying to say is that at times my parents force me to go to temples at the time of some occassion (say) ganesh puja as now.... and they really pester me with this compulsion like its a good thing..i cant oppose them n stand and say NO... i dont like defending my parents by offending them that hurts their heart and me too... but on the other hand, i dislike anything thats made to do of me without my interest... and so comes the barrier...

now what m i supposed to do in such situ..what m i supposed to think...as for as my mind says i dont like visiting the temple..atleast not on compulsion...but the heart thinks entirely a different planet of thoughts....cuz as i said i dont like offending them...and in reality what i really end up doin is not visiting the temple....

and this whole epiphany times are hard on mee......i try and do some rituals at these festival times.....i do prayers when the heart feels to do so...when it comforts me, my soul...its really marvell feel when m extricated from these forced orders......

also i would say that m no atheist..i believe in god.. i trust in HIM and cuz his plans too...i believe his text of each one's life....but then does it mean he only hears us when we stand in front of him and join hands or kneel down or maybe make a hooly cross....does this really the only source of worship...

then where does those theories come from which say that god resides in us....HE is everywher...HE's omnipresent... if thats the true sense of HIS existance then cant we stay home and pray to HIM....i visit temples at seldom intervals....at times when i need peace .. when i really need some time off everyone...even the past...every darn thing that has occupied me...

i can say that god is everywhere.. and its upto the interest of ppl to worship or not...its personal to do what they like...but m confused with this whole parents and suggestion thing...

any suggestion on how to deal with it without disrespecting the parents....???

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